Thursday, February 14, 2013

3 ways to make your child feel loved

(Love these sweet little Valentines of mine...and yes, that is a vintage NCState sweater Charlie is wearing passed down from his Pops, to his daddy, and now to him!)

3 ways to make your child feel loved:


1.  Listen to them.

If it's important to them, it should be important to you.  No matter how big or small the issue/problem/situation is, let them know that you care about what they're going through.    


2.  Don't tell their secrets. 
(or even day to day things they share with just you.)

Serious or funny.  Big or small.  This is how trust is formed and maintained, I'm sure of it.  


3.  Give them opportunities to succeed.

Introduce them to new things, (classes, books, performances, ideas), so they can excel in a certain (or several) areas.  Support their interests and do everything in your power to help them succeed.



Of course, these are just 3 of the many, many ways you can make your child feel loved (at any age).

How did your parents make you feel loved growing up?  What is something that you do to show love towards your children?

Happy Valentine's Day, my friends.  I hope you're able to spend it with someone you love.

40 comments :

Megan said...

That sweater is adorable! How cool is that! Great advice!

One of my biggest pet peeves with parents (since I have no kids of my own) is having unrealistic expectations for their kids. I hate when I meet with parents and they can't accept the fact that their kid isn't a math whiz or their kid isn't ever going to make top grades in school. Then, they can't encourage what their child is talented in. I know parents want their kids to succeed and I'm not saying parents shouldn't push their kids to try their best. I try to teach my class that it's about trying YOUR best and your best may look different from someone else's best because we all have different abilities and talents. I feel like some kids have way too much pressure put on them. They probably feel like their parents are disappointed in them.

Anyway, sorry for the long comment. I could get on a soapbox about that! So basically, accept your child for who they are and encourage their own personal strengths and talents. :)

Annie said...

Ashley they are TOO cute in those little outfits! Such a sweet post :) Happy Valentine's Day!

Annie
The Other Side of Gray

Aimee said...

My favorite is #1. Even when Paige is trying to tell me something that I have zero interest in (Ava at preschool wore pink tights? Oh.. cool...), I make sure she thinks that I truly care and that what she has to say is important. As parents, we need to validate our babies! XoXo Happy Valentines Day, Ashley!

The Mrs. and The Momma said...

You've got some adorable men in your life! Heart breakers for sure! Great tips! :)

Helene said...

I love this, especially #2 because my mom was so good about always keeping my secrets and it always made me feel like I could trust her with everything. So sweet.

Katie @ Team Skelley said...

Happy Valentine's Day to your little cherubs!

TheTinyHeart said...

They both look so cute in their little preppy outfits! #1 is so true...I'm always venting to my mom because she's the best listener!

-Sharon
The Tiny Heart
JCrew giveaway!

Rebecca S. said...

Great advice, I will remember this. That sweater is adorable, once again the kids are too cute to handle!

Unknown said...

Super cute sweater! And what a great tradition to pass it along.
These are cute and simple, yet important things to do with our littles for sure. Thanks for sharing.

Just love // kelly

still being [molly] said...

i LOVE this!! making note for when i'm finally a mama :) SOSOON!

SH said...

I love their little sweaters! So stylish, and this is great advice. Happy V-day!

Sheree
The Hartungs Blog
thehartungs.blogspot.ca

Unknown said...

hey hun
Happy Valentine's Day!!!!!
I just found your blog ans I love it!
really cute lay out and interestig post!
Check my blog if you want and maybe we can follow each other:)
I have also a GIVEAWAY hosted in my blog!
xoxo

www.fashionrailways.com

Krista said...

First of all I'm dying from the cuteness of your little gentlemen! Awwwww!

I heard once that listening to your kids is so important when they are small. Because to them everything is a big deal and if you don't listen then, they won't tell you anything when they are older and things really are a big deal. Awesome advise and one I am working harder on. And looking them in the eye so they know I am listening!

Theresa Mahoney said...

I totally agree with the don't share the secrets! My daughter tells me things because she knows I won't say anything. My neighbor insists that there are "no secrets in parenting" and tells her husband everything, then wonders why her daughter won't open up to her. Unless it is something I feel strongly that my husband needs to know, whatever she tells me stays between the two of us.

Happy Valentine's Day! I adore the heart sweater you wore in yesterdays post!

Unknown said...

I think #1 is the biggest one! I love that my mom always listened to me and I love that when I go see my nieces and nephews they always have a bilion things to tell me.

renae said...

oh Ashley! I have been super busy lately and have missed many of your posts, but today is Valentine's Day and my hubby are happy to be home and not running here or there.

This next post photo of the heart sweater is so cute of you. I love your smile.

Your list for great children is so wonderful. One of my cousin's married a great gal and they have raised 6 children on those same or similar guidelines. When the 2nd oldest son left on his mission, his Mom kept saying, "Don't anybody cry. Just pray he gets on that plane and stays on it." hahahahaha.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!

Kayla Peveler said...

I loooove this. Those are probably two of the cutest little babes I've ever seen. Love their hair! & Charlie's sweater! Ahh!

Happy Valentines Day, girl! Love ya!

SpryOnTheWall said...

Oh my gosh, your boys are so cute! And you know I'm loving that vintage State sweater - so cute! Happy Valentine's Day to you!

Amy Shaughnessy said...

Those boys are too cute!! I definitely agree with the listening part. Little kids just want their mama's (and dada's) attention.

Amy

Fashion and Beauty Finds

Care said...

Amen! so great! by the way those outfits are crazy cute once again..! Do you want them to get married when there 10 bc that's whats gunna happen when you dress them so cute!:)

carrieburke said...

I think one of the ways my parents made me feel loved growing up was definitely by not telling my secrets. They were never anything important but it still made me feel safe with them. Like one time when I was in the 2nd grade, I told my mom that my best friend didn't eat her sandwich at lunch even though her mother told she had to. And my mom never told (even though it was silly)! But I knew from that, I could tell her secrets that were even more important than that.

And your sons looks so adorable in those photos! I'm loving the preppy, slicked hair look!

Sybil said...

aawww super adorable!! and i totally love this post! :D

Click me for my NEW BLOG

Nicole | Pharr Away said...

Love, love, LOVE these tips, especially #2. I felt comfortable telling my mother anything because of this and it made us close. I hope the same for me and my children.

And do I even have to say it...I'm in LOVE with the sweater (especially the history behind it)!!!

lori said...

great post, ashley! i love the secrets one... i always felt safe telling my mom things growing up- knowing she wouldn't share them. and i want to be the same way with my kids!

Jamie Sefcik || Hello Little Scout said...

Love these! They are so perfect and true. :)

xoxo Jamie

helen said...

those pictures of your little ones are SO cute. love the vintagey goodness. great advice....good to keep in mind if i were to have kids! :)))

Unknown said...

This is wonderful! My parents did these very 3 things, and it makes all the difference! I love when you post pics of your little men... they are so amazing!

Just Another Shopaholic said...

I love this post girl and the outfits are adorable!

Unknown said...

Adorable photos! And these are great tips! I don't have children but my mom teaches child development so I've grown up hearing all the things that children need. These are definitely at the top! :)

www.kacieskloset.blogspot.com
www.daisyraeboutique.com

Rach said...

This is so sweet! I love the shots of the boys together. Those sweaters are precious. And these are great tips, thanks friend!

Unknown said...

I couldn't agree with you more! I love talking to my nephews about their weeks at school, their thoughts, why they think whatever it is they think, and etc...

Chao
Poppie
http://thepoppie.com

Modern Camelot said...

I love this post...what great pieces of advice, and so important for kids to feel important and loved by us!

Brittany LeSueur said...

New reader!!! This is so true...especially that last one. We are getting our boys in swim lessons so i am hoping this is something they can feel good about...especially my 3year old! Love your blog!

Taylor @ Pink Heels Pink Truck said...

Loving the clothes on these two little boys!! So cute! They look like little men. ;)
Great advice momma!

s said...

so awesome! xO!
www.thehautecookie.com

Unknown said...

Lovely blog! Found your card at the BYB conference. I'm your newest follower!

Because Shanna Said So said...

Loved this!!! As they get older don't try to compete or compare them to their friends. And focusing on the positive that they do works MUCH better than focusing on things that they do to upset us. I wish there was a parenting book! LOL!

rooth said...

I'm so terribly down with number 2 - you are so awesome for figuring that out so quickly. I think my parents and I would have a different relationship if 2 was instituted in our relationship

Elegance and Mommyhood said...

Hi Ashley, I am Ada & I found your blog last week and love it. Your boys are adorably beautiful WOW. I could sure use your advise about kids too, since I just became a mom myself. =)

What a great Red Bag too & I agree about Airport essentials.

Also, check this out, a little surprise for you. =)

http://elegancepersonification.blogspot.com/2013/02/weeks-best-looks-february-17th-2013.html


Thanks, Ada.

Emmy said...

Great great list! And yes really listen to them-- it is so easy not to do especially if they are going on and on forever about the race car they are "building" as my son does-- but I try so hard to listen so that someday when he really needs to talk about something he knows that I listen.

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